11 June 2007

The assh0l3s stole my resume...

This is an ad from one of CA's recruiters:

Great client in Denver Tech Center is looking for a Sr. Systems Engineer for permanent placement.
Requirements:
System design, implementation, and support.
Perform Solaris/Linux system administration duties related to; user account maintenance, backup & recovery, documentation, and license management.
Experience with SAN engineering experience for StorageTek Flexline & 6540 system with McData switching, Sun 5320 NAS heads for NFS/CIFS/SMB shares for various platforms, StorageTek SL500
Experience in developing Solaris 10 standards documents for Solaris technologies (logical domain, ZFS, zones, FSS, projects, etc).
Coordinate build-outs, maintain, and manage co-location datacenter facility. Define standards for layout, labeling & facility documentation. System infrastructure currently includes x64 servers, T1000s, various midrange servers to E6900s running Solaris, Dell/windows systems, and IBM/Redhat Blade centers.
Coordinate monthly server maintenance window.
Plan, document, and manage system patching, server installations & upgrades. Create change request documents for business notification.
Experience with Solaris Jumpstart system configuration server.
Systems and applications support for: Inter-Tel Axxess, VMware VI3, Foundry Load Balancers, Oracle, AD, Blackberry Enterprise Server, RSA appliances, Citrix Metaframe, Nagios, Cacti, and Splunk.



This is my resume entry for CA:
· Lead engineer for a leading financial services company that provides an IT solution to enable franchise collections. System design, implementation, and support. Mentor & support junior administrators for both UNIX & Windows.
· Perform Solaris/Linux system administration duties related to; user account maintenance, backup & recovery, documentation, and license management.
· Primary SAN engineer for StorageTek Flexline & 6540 system with McData switching, Sun 5320 NAS heads for NFS/CIFS/SMB shares for various platforms, StorageTek SL500 backup library for Veritas NBU system.
· Developing Solaris 10 standards documents for Solaris technologies (logical domain, ZFS, zones, FSS, projects, etc).
· Coordinated build-out, maintain, and manage co-location datacenter facility. Defined standards for layout, labeling & facility documentation. System infrastructure includes x64 servers, T1000s, various midrange servers to E6900s running Solaris, Dell/windows systems, and IBM/Redhat Blade centers.
· Coordinate monthly server maintenance window. Plan, document, and manage system patching, server installations & upgrades. Create change request documents for business notification.
· Developed and implemented Solaris Jumpstart system configuration server. All Solaris servers can be reloaded and ready for production in an hour, bare metal to functional system.
· Systems and applications supported: Inter-Tel Axxess, VMware VI3, Foundry Load Balancers, Oracle, AD, Blackberry Enterprise Server, RSA appliances, Citrix Metaframe, Nagios, Cacti, and Splunk.


Yeah, can't fire me because of ADD is right. DAMN them!

8 comments:

handrail said...

you should apply!

wb said...

it crossed my mind, just to be funny. sick, yet funny.

I would just like to chew the asshole out.

all said...

copyright infringement!

Ethan Galstad said...

Heh - Someone forwarded this to me because they received a Gmail news alert for "Nagios". Very nice rant. :-) I'd smack them up with an invoice for unauthorized use of your resume. Copyright infringement does cost you (your time), so they should compensate. Just my 2 cents.

Amy said...

see they do know you are better than them
copying is the highest form of flattery

Maybe HR should know about it?

all said...

Whats up, my nagios?

h3nry said...

Damn brownie, you best be backin up with that nagios shizzle. I's bouts to bust a cap in yo nagios ass.

wb said...

I'll be satisfied when I get to tell them that I am glad they could find a use for my work. Mind you stolen from my fvcking resume. ugh, someone needs to hire me soon!